Poetry Page
		Why I Am   by Bulbul Gupta I remember as a little girl Carefree, outgoing, bubbly Being slapped and beaten For my lack of perfection, never good enough. I was not allowed that night To go and play with my friends For fear that the other parents might see The white handprints on my bright, red face. I remember my first boyfriend The love of my young life for years Ordering me not to participate, to talk For I had nothing intelligent to say. Or my first good guy friend in college We hit it off so well right away Who became my rapist tow months later And said I was a tease, that I asked for it. I remember my ex-boyfriend this summer As we had finally managed to stay friends Who threw me into a wall And smothered my face with a pillow Because I had said something that offended him In front of his friends I remember all the friends Who have stood by and watched, said nothing. I remember those who tried to help Not knowing quite what to do, As they held me confused, crying and scared Those who have watched me struggle To pick up the pieces repeatedly shattered Trying to find the tools, the adhesive that will finally hold them all together. Everyday is a struggle to survive To prove that I can make it That I am strong That this will not defeat me, render me powerless. So when you ask why it is That I participate so much, talk too much It is because I have another version to add To your perception of our world.