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----------------------- Ben "Easy on the Ice" Alfred- Baritone '09Boston, Massachusetts
Upon being accepted into SOP Ben was asked to drink a gallon of milk whilst whistling "I'm a little teapot" in his underwear. Pretty funny right? WRONG. Hazing is never funny (except if you're hazing a clown). Ben was so shaken by his experience with NASCAR velocity vomit that he decided to swear off dairy for the rest of his life. This put him at odds with his father however, who is one of the single biggest dairy magnates in New England (The Bukkake Dairy farm, maybe you've heard of them). Since then, Ben has done what any rational soul in his situation would do. Midget porn. Hear Ben sing "Dick in a Box" by Andy Samberg and Justin Timberlake. ----------------------- Erik "Open Bar" Bergmann - Bass '09Alliance, Ohio (The other side of the rainbow)
Erik is self-deprecating; he says, "You know that guy from "Don't be that guy"? I'm him." Me thinks otherwise. Hear Erik sing "Push" by Matchbox 20. ----------------------- Sal "The Don" Colleluori- Baritone '10Syosset, NY
Before joining SOP, Sal followed his father into the import and export business, but couldn't find his niche. After trying garbage removal with his uncle Joey, and bookkeeping with his cousin Leon, he just couldn't seem to find a fit. Finally, Sal came to GW, and he found his calling in SOP. We love having him too, because SOP gets a lot more ticket revenues. Oh sure, the entire back two rows at our concerts wear Armani suits and don't applaud, cat call, or even show emotion - but it's a small price to pay for the other benefits of having Sal in the group. Other a cappella groups on campus just haven't seemed the same since Sal joined SOP. That's generally because most of them turned up missing, died in unfortunate accidents, or got out of the singing biz after waking up next to a severed horse head. We can't explain these coincidences, and neither can you. Capeesh? ----------------------- Dominick "The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he, who in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee." DeGaetano- Bass '10West Babylon, New York
Dominick DeGaetano has made his bones as a hitter for the legendary crime boss Marcellus Wallace. With a sweet Jheri curl and an even sweeter disposition, Dom is the most dangerous kind of hitman, the one who you never expect. Seriously, look at him! You wouldn't think someone that innocent-looking had 98 confirmed kills in 'Nam would you? No, you wouldn't. Since then, Dom has calmed down slightly, with a murder once every so often (read: every 2 days). So watch your step around this kid, because women want him, and men want him dead. Hear Dom sing "Tonight" by Kool and the Gang. ----------------------- Rob "Rob 5000" Dettore - Tenor '10Berwyn, Pennsylvania
Rob made and lost his first fortune before the age of 13 after inventing his revolutionary new home workout system, the Rob 5000. Unfortunately, due to a clerical oversight on his assistant's (Tony Little) part, the patent wasn't recognized, and the idea was stolen and renamed The Gazelle™. He bounced back though, and did some voice over work for Stevie Wonder, but got out of the business soon after Mili Vanili got broken up, for fear of being discovered. Since then, Rob has dabbled in this, and dabbled in that. He may have also dabbled in your younger sister when you weren't looking, so be careful. Hear Rob sing "Crazy" by Gnarls Barkeley. ----------------------- Adam "Chicken-Pocket" Farrar- Tenor '09Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
What to say about Adam Farrar that hasn't already been said about the great philosophs of the world? Raised on the harsh streets of New Delhi, Adam spent four years of his life dodging sacred cattle and snake charming to earn a slight living. One day he had to stay "One Jump" ahead of the palace guards, who were hot on his (and his pet monkey Abu's [no pun intended]) tail. After eluding the guards, Adam and his Family moved westward, and settled in the lovely hamlet of Philidelphia PA. Adam attended a Quaker school, which he quickly learned was "A Whole New World." His prowess in sports and debate however earned him the nickname "Prince Ali" and he was loved by all who knew him. Since then, Adam has spent his time catering to various philanthropic musings. Let's face it. The guy makes Gandhi look like a child-pornographer. ----------------------- Dan "HEY! CHECK OUT THESE BICUSPIDS!" Greenblatt- Bass '08Princeton, Dirty Jerz
Imagine, if you can, a world where trees are made out of chocolate bark, and rivers run red with Hawaiian Punch. Raindrops are lemon drops and gumdrops (ignoring of course the obvious effect this would have on the water cycle), and houses are made out of gingerbread and frosting. What a world it would be. Now imagine a dentist in that world. Dan Greenblatt is that dentist. Known for his razor wit and striking good looks, Dan will leap small bushes in a single bound, simply to prove he can do it. After Dave "A-M-A" Wilson left the group, Dan gained the coveted title of "most likely to come back from abroad with ebola." A title which he has fiercely defended by coughing and bleeding on anyone unfortunate enough to get close to him. Currently, his white cell count is dwindling, but if those men at the CDC have their way, Dan will be either cured or dead by sometime next week. Let's all hope for the former and not the latter in that situation right? Come on Jacky Fung, don't be a dick. Alright fine, be a dick. ----------------------- Alex "Wrap it Up" Hecht - Baritone '08Syosset, NY
Know the expression "you are what you eat?" If that's true Alex is an amalgam of cow hearts and stem cells. In his spare time Alex dabbles in neurosurgery and yachting. Raised on the hard streets of Syosset, Long Island, Alex grew up with a gat in one hand and a 40. in the other. He was born with a half-empty bottle of Jack Daniel's in his hand which he smashed over his head to demonstrate how much of a "bad-ass" he is. He poses only one question: Ever had a sudden pain in your chest that you couldn't explain? That was Alex Hecht, and it was a warning. Hear Alex sing "Without Your Love" by M*Pact. ----------------------- Matthew "Simba" Ireton - Baritone '08Tokyo, Japan
Matthew Ireton hates the word status. He's also colorful. We support him in everything that he does. He loves Disney, ask him...he'll tell you. Seriously, ask him. What're you afraid? Bitch. That's right, Matt Ireton's third person just called you a bitch. A sweetheart straight out of Tokyo, Matt loves the NY Yankees, much to the chagrin of fellow baritone , Dave "A-M-A" Wilson,. Most of SOP's rehearsal time is consumed with trying to keep Dave from killing Matt. You would think he knows karate...nope. You also probably didn't even notice that his bio was the exact same thing as Stanley Kuo's to begin with. Yeah...all Asians look the same don't they? Prick. ----------------------- Ellis "The South Will Rise Again (GET IT?)" Izlar-Baritone '11Savannah, Georgia
Ellis Izlar emerged from the womb clad in a three-piece seersucker suit, clutching a mint julep, and sporting a delightful bowtie/stringtie combination. As he grew, the seersucker grew with him, and his position on his family's plantation, Lara, grew as well. Since the tobacco fields had long since gone fallow, the Izlar clan decided to begin farming rubber trees and marketing to Firestone. Unfortunately, the so-called "Izlar Blend" of rubber was notoriously defective and responsible for a large number of blowouts and SUV rollovers. Since then Ellis has taken his family's rubber blend with him and marketed it to Durex brand condoms as the first "no slip, treaded condom (patent pending)." Sales in the US have been slow, but the product is KILLING in Manitoba...go figure. ----------------------- Will "Choke a Bitch" Kamovitch- Bass '10Elk Rapids, Michigan
Will was raised in the traditional Latvian style - hookers, chocolate mousse, and having wine poured in his eyes at age 3 to "put on the toughen in [non-translatable]". Once he came to America, his eyes opened to the world outside of Eastern Europe, and he started hunting the elderly for sport. Does that make him a bad person? NO! THEY'RE OVERPOPULATING AND CROWDING UP OUR CITIES! Or at least that's what Will told us while brandishing his elephant gun, so we're gonna stick with that as SOP's official stance - at least until he needs to reload. ----------------------- Mike "Mike "My Name is Alliterative" Mentzel" Mentzel - Tenor 1 '10Huntingdon Valley, Pennsylvania
Mike is a great big hairy American singing machine. He wakes up in the morning and pisses slightly above average standardized test scores. Also, much like a starfish, Mike is capable of asexual reproduction. You'd never know it though, until you accidentally severed his head and you ended up with two Mentzels. In all seriousness - as much as we needed another tenor, we just smothered the clone. It was getting fucking creepy. ----------------------- Sean "I AM a fucking Eskimo" Offer- Tenor '10DIZZZZZZNEY!!!!!, Florida
The Inuit people resent being called Eskimo, because it implies “seal-eater.” Sean “I AM a Fucking Eskimo” Offer, on the other hand, revels in it. Known to ride his rampaging Walrus, Vralworth the Toothy (a level 60 mount), onto a beach full of baby seals sunning themselves, Offer slays the helpless creatures at will, maniacally grinning at the carnage. Of course – Offer isn’t cruel – he balks at the idea of killing infant seals to sell their skins to the fashion industry – he does it for fun. ----------------------- Chris "Tonight's GOTTA be the night" Russo- Tenor '10Old Brookville, New York
A competitive eater who's trained with the likes of Kobayashi and the so-called "eater-x," Chris Russo is an animal when it comes to eating. Not only that, but because he owns his own self-storage business, he both literally and figuratively puts it away. Also known to play jai-alai obsessively, Russo has been known to fling the pelota at upwards of 170 miles an hour. In recent years, Russo has taken an interest in wedding planning, and as can be seen in his photo, is a bride's best friend. Chris is also known to take meticulous care of his clients "special days" and hence where his nickname comes from. Nowhere else. ----------------------- Phil "I Don't Have This Much Hair Anymore " Sherman - Tenor '0XGreenwich, CT*
Phil, a founding member of SOP, is very pleased to be performing with Sons of Pitch, although he will never love us as much as he loves his high school a cappella group. When he’s not singing, Phil loves to run. In fact during the late 70s he once ran all the way across the United States, attracting a sizable following and inadvertently inventing the smiley face t-shirt and the oft-used phrase, “shit happens.” Phil is currently working on his Ph.D in Swedish language and literature at GW. Prior to joining Sons of Pitch, he served under the recently ousted Swedish Dictator, Sven Bjorksen, as Minister of Culture. Phil would like to give a shout out to his mama and would like to remind the world that no one appreciates his artistic vision. Bjergen! *But now resides in Stuart, Florida and Östersund, Sweden Hear Phil Sing "Good Ol' A Cappella" by Deke Sharon. ----------------------- Alex "Thank you, come again" Thomas - Tenor '11Bethlehem, Pennsylvania
Contrary to popular belief, not every Eastern Indian owns a 7/11 (I know, weird right?). Regardless, Alex's nickname is derived not from Apu's iconic phrase, but rather the words he utters every time he finishes an intense scene in the sex industry. Also known by his stage name "Lex the impaler" Alex has become vivid video's number one male star of all-time. His trademark position, the "Bhagavad Get-her" requires four women, himself, a goat and a six-armed deity with purple skin. In addition, Alex's role as Sunjay the Cobbler in the Bollywood Epic "Bye-Bye Bangalore" netted him a best-actor award at the 65th annual Nataraj awards, nicknamed the "Gandhi's." Since then, Alex has settled down; he accepted a place in Sons of Pitch, and while he still yearns for his years of ululating wildly on the celluloid, he realizes that gone are the days of musical reverie. They've been replaced with a world of fluffers and K-Y jelly. We're sorry buddy. ----------------------- |
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